Category Archives: Tactics 101

The (Computer) Mousetrap


The so-called Magic Mouse cannot possibly escape my evil clutches!



We’re Back!

Please excuse our absence on the internets during the past few weeks. Mum was very ill with the flu.  We nursed her back to health and we’re glad we did not fall victim to her disease.


Here I am demonstrating the well-known ‘dead weight’ treatment. It is especially useful for guardians who have been ordered to rest. Simply drape yourself on the sick guardian with little regard for their comfort. They will soon grow numb anyway.


Goodbye, flu. Don’t come back.

Compulsory Rest Stops

Pinkie and me have been very busy helping Mum with her writing job. She works very hard. I am afraid for her occupational health and safety. She must take proper rest breaks wherever and whenever possible. Here is a sample of my recommended break schedule:


2:00 – 10-minute nap


2:15 – 10-minute nap


2:30 – 10-minute nap


Pinkie Noms Best

O gud! Possum iz looking teh other way! Tee-hee!

– Nom! Nom! Nom!
No, no, no, Pinkie!

You See?

Srsly, Pinkie, you have very bad table manners.
Mum and Dad will send you to finishing school in Switzerland if you’re not careful!

Pinkie’s Ottoman Empire

Pinkie's Ottoman Empire

Pinklepurr rules his ottoman chair with an iron claw.
“No can has, Possum!”


Mum and Dad had a special ottoman built just for Pinkie.

Well…they had it specially made for themselves, but Pinkie quickly took ownership of it. I am not allowed on it. This is okay by me, though, because the rest of the house is my empire. Silly Pinkie!

By the way, Pinkie got in trouble yesterday after he chased another cat and lost his collar. Usually, when Mum and Dad yell at Pinkie, I give him a swipe with my paw to help teach him a lesson. But I had mercy on him because it was Sunday and I didn’t want to get off the couch.


Last Chance on the Stairway?

Definitely not the stairway to heaven.

This is not the stairway to heaven.

Hello. It’s Possum here! Yes, I have fully recovered from yesterday’s high-speed collision with the glass door. Mum and Dad took very good care of me. They promised not to send Pinkie away to the circus for his role in my accident.

Duran Duran fans will recognise the title of this post as that of track 7 on Rio, one of Mum’s favourite albums. We know the lyrics of every song by heart. If only we could sing instead of yowl. We enjoy dancing to the xylophone interlude, though.

Another song on that album is Hungry Like the Wolf. Mum has to resort to listening to this tune on headphones so as not to upset Pinklepurr, who has an acute wolf phobia. How did he develop this problem? Unlike myself, Pinkie watches a lot of television. Over a year ago, he, Mum and Dad were glued to a documentary called The Rise of Black Wolf. Pinkie believed the ferocious wolves were right outside our house. He was most concerned. No one could convince him that the wolves were inside the television. Consequently, he refused to go into the garden for an entire week. He is okay now, but really, best not to mention the ‘W’ word to him. Ever. Again. Cat therapy is expensive.


Tactics 101: How to Get in the Way of Your Human’s Work – Part 1

Here are some tried-and-tested tactics that will force your humans to work less and therefore have more time to pander to your needs. You’re welcome.

Sing. Sing out loud. And often.

If you have weepy eyes, rub your face all over her laptop.
This tactic can also be employed if you *don’t* have a contagious eye condition.

No explanation necessary.

Drape yourself over your human’s forearm while she types. This will be uncomfortable for both of you at first. However, you come out on top because she will eventually give up on trying to meet a deadline and will cuddle you to console herself.

In our household, the iPad is used for play rather than work.
I use it as a place of rest. I have renamed it the iMat.

Purrs…x Possum

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